Guardians of the Hearth

Jeff and I were asked to speak at our Stake Relief Society Conference on Strengthening Marriage.

We were called several months ago and I have spent hours praying and studying about the subject.  

It was intimidating to me knowing that there are so many different types of marriages and

many not married for various reasons. 

I didn't want to offend anyone or make them feel uncomfortable.  

I finally based by message on these three wall hangings from our bedroom.

                                                            The involvement of the Savior in our marriages is so important.  

This picture symbolizes to me His love for each of us no matter where we are at on our path.I mentioned that if your husband is not willing to participate in activities to bring the Savior into your marriage, do it alone and your relationship will still be blessed by His Presence.

Since we all have our agency a husband who chooses not to do these things, should not be criticized but loved even more as the wife draws closer to the Savior.  

Everything we do needs to be centered in Him

This particular painting of the Salt Lake Temple is a watercolor depiction of the temple during a rainstorm.  It is entitled "Refuge from the Storm"  

We need to attend the temple often together to renew and remember those Eternal Covenants we made there.  

If someone hasn't made those covenants they need to life to soon receive them.  

Because of these covenants we should have a greater commitment to our marriages 

and a stronger desire to be true and faithful to one another.  

The remainder of my message was based around this common cliché.  

It is my mantra for facing each day.  

Satan is on a rampage to destroy Righteous Marriages.  Because of his premortal choices he will never have a body so he can never have a relationship, or be married, or have a family.  

He wants everyone to be as miserable and lonely as he is.

His attacks against the family will continue to increase in intensity, frequency and sophistication.

We need to LIVE each day by Christ's example, emulating his attributes into our lives.

As I was preparing this talk I felt so strongly to include the attribute of Meekness in our Marriage.

Meekness is not weakness or being a doormat to someone.

True Meekness means living with kindness, tolerance, patience and forgiveness.  

There is no room in any marriage for harsh words, criticism, unkindness or cruelty. 

We need to be SUBMISSIVE together to the will of the Lord.

Next I spoke on the word LAUGH. 

We are all plagued with challenges in our lives, no one is free from them.  

Elder Bednar in April Conference told us that these trials are necessary to enable us to return to Him.

Pres. Gordon B Hinckley said

"In all of living have much of fun and laughter.  Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured."

In the Book of Mormon we are taught:  "Men are that they might have Joy."

The important word in that scripture is MIGHT.  It is a choice.  

We need to choose to be happy, choose to stay close to our spouse, 

and choose to be optimistic in all things.  

Finally LOVE.  

Jeff and I were married because we LOVED each other.

Now many years later we need to nurture that love every day.  

We never part for the day without a kiss and an "I Love You."

We always sit together at church, movies, sporting events.  (No children small or grown between us)

Our relationship is number 1.

We try to take time for one another, strive to enjoy each other's interests, and have a weekly date.

I mentioned how important physical contact is in a marriage.

Be tender and affectionate with each other.

Touch lots and touch often. 

The importance of marital intimacy should never be overlooked.

It is a time to become one, physically as well as emotionally and spiritually.

You are united in overcoming whatever mountains you need to climb.

I mentioned the idea of serving one another selflessly is the key to happiness in a marriage.

Of course I closed with my Favorite Scripture which I always use.  It is found in Helaman 5:12.

I changed a couple of words to fit closer this message on marriage.

And now, my sons (Daughters), remember, remember that it is upon the^arock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your ^bfoundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty ^cstorm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men (Marriages)  build they cannot fall.

That is a quick and short version of my message.  

How grateful I am for the opportunity to study and ponder on marriage for the past few months. 

As I have observed others and their interactions with one another, 

I realize that all marriages are unique.

The basic principles will always remain in force.

We need the Savior with us, we need the strength of the temple, and most importantly

we need to show respect and love for one another.  

I am eternally blessed to be married to Jeff.  I love him dearly.

Best decision I made 36 years ago was to marry him.